Canadian Geese

This morning I awoke to the sound of honking...not from a car, but from a flock of Canadian Geese.  The sound brought a smile to my face because I was reminded of their beauty and symbolism in my life.  Several years ago, my dear friend, Monica, shared with me an interesting concept about the Canadian Geese's flight.

Canadian Geese support one another as they fly in a V-formation.  At the front of the V, a goose will fight the wind and basically carry the burden of the flock.  The other geese fly at the precise angle, rather than directly behind each other, allowing the birds to easily fly in the draft.  The honking is their encouragement to the front goose.  The geese continue this pattern of flight until they reach their destination and land gracefully.  Another interesting fact is, if one of the birds become injured, two other birds will stay with the injured bird until it is ready to fly again. 

I am SO blessed to have family, friends, young women from my church, and loved ones who have helped me "fly through the winds" of this most recent heart-hurt--infertility.  Many have stayed by my side and provided a shoulder to cry on, a kind word, and numerous prayers on our behalf.  Through their acts of service, I have also recognized God's tender mercies and love for me.  Their acts of love have provided strength and encouragement to weather the dark storms of anger and the "unknown".  

President Spencer W. Kimball, the 12th prophet of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints said, "God does notice us, and he watches over us.  But it is usually through another person that he meets our needs."  

I am grateful for the reminder that God is there when we are in the midst of trials and difficult times.  THANK YOU!!!  

My hope is that we can all reach out beyond our personal heart-hurt and lift one another.  I know I'm going to try a little harder.  Life is made beautiful as we support, lift, and strengthen one another just like the graceful Canadian Geese!

Love of my Life

I typically wait for a while before acting, and the same holds true here.  I waited quite a bit before writing a post.

Allow me to add a disclaimer - I am not writing this post to drum up any sympathy or feelings from people about feeling sorry for us.  Though what I am writing might trigger people to think about our situation, I'd rather we all use it as a motivation to examine our own situations - to look at what is, rather than what could be.  I am a firm believer in attitude being based on what you are looking at, and our situation is no different.

Let me describe the situation my sweetest love and I find ourselves in, but I'll do it through our story.

We were married almost a half of a decade ago, and a few years into the marriage, we knew something wasn't happening in the way the rest of the world happened - we were seeing no children.  After visiting with specialists, sitting across from a doctor and hearing "there is nothing I can really do for you", trust me, your heart shatters.  It's not a break, it's a shatter.

But, while sitting and hearing those words, and feeling the spirit of God whisper (from Psalms 46:10), "Be still, and know that I am God", one can't help but realize that we truly are in His hands.  That doesn't make it any easier.  It actually makes it a little harder if you like to have things in your own control.  We were suddenly unable to be the one behind the eight ball - and there was nothing we could do about it.  We tried another doctor a year later, but the same result came with a resounding and emphatic "no!"

We fought with the thoughts of thinking we had done wrong, had made a mistake, or caused some grievance that would forever mar our lives.  We were (and still are) plagued with finding out a friend or colleague is pregnant (that's good news, and we still need to hear about it), or read news stories of parents who try to sell a child for drug money, or see bad situations that some are in..... and having those wounds re-opened.  There will likely not be an end to this.  Granted, time wounds all heels (or is that heals all wounds), but this wound may never heal.

So, here we are, having been dragged through the brutal reality of it all, knowing that we can't have children of our own.  Our only recourse (and the only thing that might possibly help heal the wounds) is adoption.   We'd love some children, and if we can't have our own, perhaps we can find another one that will fit in, and make this a complete family.  Perhaps we can find that one lad or lass who will perfectly compliment our family.  Keep your eyes and ears open, and if you run across a situation that could benefit everyone involved, let us know.  We have profile links to the top-right (along with e-mail links, too!) so you can contact us, or visit :

https://itsaboutlove.org/ial/profiles/28499924/ourMessage.jsf